Being Happy: Part II

I can't believe it was over a year ago that I wrote this post "Being Happy..." I'm quite proud of that post, for once everything I wanted to say came out right. However since I wrote that post, a lot has changed. Back then my life was in a better place, and through no fault of my own, it's in quite a bad place right now. And I often find myself thinking about how I cope, day to day, and how I'm not completely depressed right now. If you want to read more about my current circumstances, you can in this post that I wrote at the end of the year, but I won't go into too much detail about everything that's going on in this post. As you'll probably notice I've also included some of my favourite quotes in this post.. Prepare for a ramble!

I always find that getting up is the hardest part of my day. When my alarm goes off and it's 5am (as if that's not bad enough) my first thought is usually why should I get up? What do I have to get up for? Yep I know that's really dark. But as I start getting ready for work, doing my usual routine of putting on my makeup in bed (it's cold okay!) whilst watching a YouTube video or two (usually the Sacconejoly's), my mood slowly improves. When I get to work my colleagues and I usually have a good chat before we start working, and because I am a people person this always lifts my mood. Once the morning is up I'm usually my happy self; it's just getting going that always takes a while and maybe a little more effort than it should do.

The thing is I know my mind. I know how to trick it into being happy, if you like. If there's the tiniest thing to look forward to, I'll focus on that. At work I'll think about it all day! Whether it's a meal out with my friends, writing a new blog post or my favourite tv programme. I'll just keep thinking about that and I'm all excited and happy! I really make sure I enjoy the little things, whether that be a cup of tea, beautiful weather or even a good hair day. I'll enjoy things as much as I can.

 

When I step back and look at my life, I honestly feel a bit sick. I'm a graduate with a really good degree, but I'm essentially in a really crappy job, which is really not what I wanted. I'm single and although I've been on some dates, men just keep letting me down and I'm really trying my best to not lose faith in them. This time last year I was excitedly planning my three month trip to America, but this year I doubt I'll even go on a holiday. Then of course the worst thing, my mum being so ill is just heartbreaking. So I don't really know how I'm still going and still happy(ish) but that's really what I'm trying to fathom with this post. Sometimes it really does help just to ramble and write things down, and as I say with many of my posts is that I would like to look back on this someday. 

I think the key to my happiness is that I'm a positive person. Whenever someone moans about something trivial or whatever I always try and make light of the situation; I offer positive reinforcement, which is essentially what I do with myself. I am also a hopeless romantic, which I am well aware of is a dangerous game to play, but I can't help but think that everything happens for a reason and that it will all work out in some weird way. I think this really helps me, as if I didn't believe this, then I'd really feel like shit to put it honestly. I just really hope that I don't lose my positive attitude and this belief as I get older, as that's a scary thing. 

I think blogging really helps me too. I love that this is something productive that I'm doing with my life, and I actually count three hours of blogging in the evening after work as chill time! I love it that much. There's always new people to talk to too, blogging is so sociable. I love taking photos and making them look pretty, writing about things that inspire me and reading about what others are loving. I love it all. And you've all really helped me, just by reading my posts and commenting, that makes my day, and gives me reason to carry on writing. So thank you so much.

I'm sorry if this post was a bit much for some of you, but I pride myself on being honest in this blog, and it really is like a diary of my life for me.

What makes you happy? How do you keep going when life get's hard?

*The Grand Canyon photos are my own but all quotes I found on Instagram and I take no credit for.